Wednesday, January 7, 2015

JT ...

So, early December, I get a FB IM from one of my girl friends asking if I was dating anyone.  I wrote back and said no (sigh).  It's certainly been a long time since I've dated anyone. She told me she had a friend who recently moved to my city and she thought we were both awesome therefore she wanted us two to contact each other.  Of course, both of us were questioning her about what the other person looked like, what was great about the other, etc.  I recall D telling me JT asked how tall I was, and she told him 5'5"...I'm the same height as his 13 year old daughter. :) 

He and I were both hesitant about the FB route, so he text me later that night.  It was 12/4/14 (Thursday) and the texts were fun and I could tell he had a sense of humor.  He also could spell and didn't use horrible text language or slang bs.  JT decided he wanted to meet me in person, so he asked me if I could get a sitter for Saturday night.  I was about vomitous at this point - this is a date?! What the actual fuck should I do?  What do I wear?  How do I remain calm and not come off as a complete newb? OH MY GAWWWD.  After locking in my bro and sis-in-law to babysit that Saturday evening around 7pm, I became nervous, anxious, excited, and suddenly scared, and questioning EVERYTHING.

After two days of nervousness and excitement, the morning of the date came.  I got a text from JT saying "how much of an ass would I be if I had to reschedule?" I hadn't slept well the night before, so I wasn't chipper about it, and certainly not after having been so excited for 40+ hours.  Turns out, he was informed his presence was wanted at his friend's Christmas party (which he had just spent the entire Friday evening help decorating for said party and not texting me).  He later said he felt obligated to go because he would be the DD.  I cried.  I was emotional like a total goob.  I was like seriously?!  If this is going to work, THIS isn't the way you start our "story"... You don't ask me to dinner and then cancel on me for a friend's Christmas party that you didn't even realize you were supposed to go to.  I was hurt because I felt our date should be more important to him.  Looking back, I realize I'm just uber-sensitive because he didn't even know me yet.  But it STILL wasn't the best beginning.  I went to my little sister's 14th birthday party that evening, and couldn't pull myself out of the funk.  I felt like I finally gave dating another shot, just to be slapped across the face by it.

Anyway, he DID ask to reschedule, and about a week later I met him at a coffee shop.

12/12/14  - Coffee @ Artista

I arrived a few minutes earlier than him (which I planned so I could watch him come in, rather than vice versa).  I picked a table near the street.  Knowing he was tall, I chose one of the tall tables.  He found me right when he came in, and we both smiled.  He had on jeans and a white, blue, and pinkish-red striped plaid-like shirt on.  When he came to sit down, one of the super tall chairs was in his place and not even the skinniest person could've gotten their legs under the table.  It was awkward, but also kinda funny.  Anyway, we talked for like 2.5 hours about so much.  Things like his kids, his ex, his divorce, his time in Iraq, his life growing up, etc.  I'd say I talked about 35-40% of the time, and he took up the rest.  I'm usually the one talking.  :)  It was AWESOME - I learned a lot about him, and I met a TALKER like me.   We both hugged as we parted and later text each other.

The following week, he asked me to lunch and we met up at my fave Mexican place.  Being neurotic like myself, I wondered how two people who barely know each other share a solo dish of salsa.  Will he be a double-dipper?  Is that BEYOND the line for me?  haha, kidding.  But is it?  ;)
He met me outside in the parking lot behind the restaurant.  He ordered one of those large burritos that my friend Nic always did.  I will just have to try one eventually and see what's up.  Anyway, we sat there for 2 hours and talked.  I felt clumsy yet comfortable with him.  When we left, I hugged him and told him that I wanted to give him a kiss on the cheek for buying lunch. (He wouldn't accept me paying half, but agreed that I'd get the next lunch).  That was nice, and I left feeling giddy.  I even started dancing in my car a bit as a I drove out of the parking lot.  Come to find out, he was right behind me and text me a few minutes later to ask about my temporary license plate sticker in the window.  :)  He probably saw me dancing like a giddy little girl.  LOL.  Welp, that's me.

3rd date - Chinese, 2.5 hours - same exact order - he used chopsticks
Discussed big kid topics like past relationships, emotional and relationship goals, etc.  - I asked how he finds time to date given his rules about no kids involved and works when he's not with kids, hours after date he asks to take me to dinner on wednesday.
Emotional vs. Sexual
Handsy
He said he'd like to keep me around.

1/7/14 7:15pm to 9:05pm Dinner date at his house ... eeek
vomitous, stomach not happy.  Nerves? wtf?
Get there, and we cook together, great place - got the tour
eat yummy spaghetti with meatballs, talk through the whole dinner
He comes toward me to say goodbye and I can tell he's going to kiss me
Ask if I get a kiss.  He grins.  Kisses me once (SUCH SOFT BIG LIPS- yum), then one more time
No tongue, JUST PERFECT.  I even said "mmm.. that's nice", I think :)

Text later saying thank you. He responds with "thank you" and "I wish time didnt go so fast"

So far, in four dates... time flies around him.


For what it's worth, THIS is worth it.  Even if he's not the one for me.  But, so far, we have a lot in common.  And after those two kisses....I want more kisses. I want to just sit next to him and hold his hand.  Innocent cuddles (sitting up) would also be great.  :)   Here's to being hopeful even when you know it will (most likely) kick your hopelessly romantic ass.  Here's to the risk, and not giving up on possibility and hope.  Here's to learning how to step out of my comfort zone.

I will remain positive and hopeful about JT (unless and until he gives me a reason not to).

Back for the rest of the detail later....